Urahara: He's catching up on sleep, and I don't think the pastor notices. Well, ok, it's kind of hard to notice when he wears that hat all the time, but for PETE'S SAKE, this is a church! Don't you have any modesty? Take off your goddamn hat in a building! Well, then again, you never really take off your hat in your own house either, so...

Renji: He's busy making a rubber band ball with the excess rubber bands that he uses for his hair. You know, I don't like rubber bands, they snap at you and hurt you...I've had many a nightmare involving torture, and possibly death, by rubber bands...

Ikkaku: Well, actually, he is quite funny right now...he's responding to the sermon with really cocky lines...Once the pastor said, "The holy light shines upon us!" and Ikkaku muttered, "No, the holy light is reflected off my HEAD..."

Yumichika: Is busy checking his hair in this little circular mirror thingy that seems to be very popular around high school girls. Upon walking in, the pastor accused him of killing innocent little canaries in order to look good. (Little does he know that the feathers are actually from a BLUEBIRD, hello? Good God, at least take some classes in birdology or whatever the hell the study of birds is called...)

Rangiku: Well, she's currently tied up with a nun on the other side of her who is currently scolding her. It goes something like this: "HOW DARE YOU DEFILE THE HOLY CHURCH OF GOD BY COMING IN HERE DRESSED AS A SLATTERN?!" (for those of you who are language-deprived, a slattern is like old English for a slut. And besides, no matter what Rangiku wears, she just looks like she needs to cover up. All the time.)